His Hair Was Perfect

Gone too long without Cruise-ing. One of my favorite songs ever, and sadly this is where I first heard it. Color of Money. Nobody's favorite Scorsese, except Tom Cruise's. Awoo.

The Existence of Life is a Highly Overrated Phenomenon

If only we could see time the way he does.

No Words

The last movie Spike Jonze made was ADAPTATION, seven years ago. Which is also the last time I can remember music working this well in a trailer or being this moved by it. This just went from guaranteed horror show to one of my two or three most anticipated of the year. I guess we'll just have to adjuuuuuuust.

Take Off Your Cool

Some of these are disturbingly apt.

Directions (if you care):
1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. Write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds.
4. If you get tagged you are under no obligation to do your own.

1) Are you a male of a female?

The Moon is the Number 18- Silver Jews

2) Describe yourself?

I Got a Story to Tell- Notorious B.I.G.

3) How do you feel about yourself?

Chips Ahoy!- The Hold Steady

4) Describe your family.

Maps- Yeah Yeah Yeahs

5) What would your family say about you?

I'm So Tired- The Beatles

6) Describe your current love interest?

Fisher of Men- M. Ward

7) What would your current love interest say about you?
Dopeman (Remix) - NWA

8) Describe your current location:
Don't You Evah- Spoon

9) Describe where you want to be:
Stan- Eminem

10) Describe what you want to be:
Stevie Nix- The Hold Steady

11) Describe your best friend:
The Overload- Talking Heads

12) What would your best friend say about you?
I'm Only Sleeping- The Beatles

13) Your favorite color is:
Anonanimal- Andrew Bird

14) You know that:
Tunneling Through the Guy- Man Man

15) What is the weather like?
I Found Love- Wilson Pickett

16) If your life was a television show, what would it be called?
Dreader Locks- Junior Byles & Lee Perry

17) What is life to you?
Please Wake Me Up- Tom Waits

18) What is the best advice you have to give?
Friction- Television

19) What is the meaning of life?
Everybody Knows That You Are Insane- Queens of the Stone Age

20) What is life’s biggest problem?
17- Kings of Leon

21) What solves the mysteries of life?
Nasty Girl- Notorious B.I.G.

22) What is your dream?
Killing is My Business... and Business is Good- Megadeth

23) What is your greatest fear?
You Ain't Missin' Nothing- T.I.

24) What is your worst attribute?
Days of Graduation- Drive-By Truckers

25) What is your greatest strength?
Your Southern Can is Mine- The White Stripes

26) Describe your love life:
Shelter From the Storm- Bob Dylan

27) How are you going to die?
Wanna Be Startin' Something 2008- Michael Jackson feat. Akon

28) If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
Brand New Cadillac- The Clash

29) What do your friends think of you?
Improper Dancing- Electric Six

30)What is your funeral song going to be?
Good Old World (Waltz)- Tom Waits

31) What will you be remembered for?
Black Shuck- The Darkness

32) What will end up being your greatest accomplishment?
Girls in Their Summer Clothes- Bruce Springsteen

33) What will be engraved on your tombstone?
Take Off Your Cool- Outkast & Norah Jones

34) What will you call this?
The New Cobweb Summer- Lambchop

Motherfuck the Wagon Come Join the Band

Thank god I don't love this country, so the choice is easy.

Bad Brains

If Lil Wayne were ruthless, he would cruise for the next two years, living off the singles from Carter III, of which there are arguably 18. But he is restless, and perhaps motivated by his goblin mind or perhaps by the success of Kanye's 808s and Heartbreak, he has chosen to go in a new direction at the height of his success. Whereas Kanye tried some cold robotic R&B, it seems like Wayne is going for something unclassifiable.

He's losing his mind and/or fucking around, and this is still probably the hook of the year so far. Emerson said in genius we recognize our own rejected thoughts coming back to us. I have a feeling Weezy will be lobbing cruise missiles.

PS look out for a special appearance by Korn, straight from the year 2000.

Happy 51st Birthday, Gary Oldman

From EVERYYYYYYYYYONNNNNNNNE.

My Future is Clear, But Also Now Unncessary

And yeah, I know this is from Pitchfork, but fuck that. I've been leaning hard on King David Berman all night trying to learn lines and write analysis for nonsensical Greek and Spanish drama, and I was wondering how infuriating their Jews Reviews News Clues were. Sadly their take on Bright Flight might be the best thing I've ever read on that site. Nate Rooney, whoever he was, got killed immediately I'm sure.

I'm also fairly sure all I ended up memorizing were the lyrics to Federal Dust. They don't cream and they don't dream in Kansas City.

I know you're ready.

AKA Big East

Putting way too much faith in the Orangemen, but they are warriors. Also my insistence on upsets has yet to really pay off, ever. Obama has put his faith in NC, Coach K, who is actually above President in the constitutional line-up, smacked him down, and if I were a good American I'd get behind Barry, but I don't really care for either the evil empire or chapel hill.

Louisville slug 'em.

Happy St. Patrick's Day

We had the Presidency. May he rest in peace.

Lies

Here's Hoping

Francis hasn't made a great movie in exactly 30 years, and even the woozy end of APOCALYPSE showed him beginning to lose his grip on the genius that made him the greatest director of the 1970s. There have been bright spots since then, RUMBLE FISH, parts of THE COTTON CLUB, but his slippage has been one of the sadder things in film. Though really it seems to have afflicted almost all of his 1970s brethren, except Speilberg and Scorsese.

Still, it's really cool to see him enthusiastic about filmmaking again though.

Yeah, no shit.

Warm-Up

This will be looked back upon fondly when The Rock loses 40 pounds and wins an Oscar for playing BHO in Oliver Stone's entirely posthumous masterpiece.

I understand.

Unchained

Can't sleep. It's only 6:48 am, or it should be. Time has been fucking stolen from me, folded into itself or like one hour fell behind the desk. Daylight savings time is fucking evil.

This late period Johnny Cash stuff is murdering me. I'm fairly certain he was God

Mask Up

Watchmen Sucks?

If only it were that simple. Jackie Earle Haley's Rorschach is legendary. Some of the film-making is first-rate. The Dr. Manhattan flashback is one of the better sequences I've seen in ages. Almost willing to say it was guest-directed by Scorsese. Pretty much everything related to Manhattan, and Crudup's performance, was outstanding. Jeffrey Dean Morgan's Blake is sleazy and sad perfection. Makeup, cinematography, visual effects, all world-class.

And yet couple that with Patrick Wilson's one-dimensional Dan Dreiberg, who should be hanging out with Dwight Schrute and Michael Scott. Malin Akerman, gorgeous, but with a performance not quite approaching the level of Cameron Diaz in THE MASK. Matthew Goode, clearly just sleepwalking until he gets to audition to play James Bond, is unforgivable. Fucking with so many little things for no reason. NIXON. Nixon fucking looking like Marv's dad and not being remotely like Nixon, but some half-assed cartoon. Jesus christ.

The grimace-inducing music cues. With the exception of only one, the All Along the Watchtower one, because by then I realized the movie was completely retarded and just smiled.

It it were simply awful, that would be easier to take. But this is something much more heart-wrenching.

Need time to think.

1 Million Dollars

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

CNBC Gives Financial Advice

Daily Show Full Episodes
Important Things With Demetri Martin

Political Humor
Joke of the Day

HERE COMES MY FACE

Inspired by being sick as a dog for two days and mainly adding album covers to my iTunes, I've had a chance to admire a few good ones. So here, about 10 months after my friends did it, are some of my favorite album covers. For more extensive coverage, you can check Justin's moribund Uninvited Modernity or Casey's ethereal, possibly defunct Sweatbees Fucking on a Coke Mirror. dot blog spot dot com.

LAMBCHOP, Is a Woman.

I never really knew what the cover to this, probably my favorite Lambchop album, was. I'm glad to know it's something so sincerely creepy. Clearly the inspiration for the creepy little boy in that Gary Oldman exorcist abortion movie.



DAVID BOWIE, Station to Station

Of all of David's artistic and aesthetic periods, this album and the Thin White Duke are my favorite. I can't really explain my enjoyment of this or why I think it was his best, but I feel it captures his coked-out grandeur. He probably thought he was a fucking angel.



LIL WAYNE, Tha Carter III

Mr. Carter killed his first Blood at age 18 months. He doesn't even remember it.



INTERPOL, Our Love to Admire

Like Interpol, this is something that should be hanging above the mantle at a millionaire's house.



I don't own these next two, and I probably wouldn't want to spoil the effect:

LL COOL J, Walking with a Panther

I represent Queens I am removed from reality.



HANK WILLIAMS JR, The Pressure is On.

I don't really feel like I have to explain this one.



IGGY POP, Lust for Life

This is the most terrifying album cover I've ever seen. Cannibal Corpse can eat it. I have no idea what was going on here.



Maybe more to come. I have an absurd amount of these on my computer right now. Peace.

Fellini's Lost Masterpiece

HARLEY DAVIDSON & THE MARLBORO MAN. No I'm not done with my Mickey obsession. Not at all.