Mask Up

Watchmen Sucks?

If only it were that simple. Jackie Earle Haley's Rorschach is legendary. Some of the film-making is first-rate. The Dr. Manhattan flashback is one of the better sequences I've seen in ages. Almost willing to say it was guest-directed by Scorsese. Pretty much everything related to Manhattan, and Crudup's performance, was outstanding. Jeffrey Dean Morgan's Blake is sleazy and sad perfection. Makeup, cinematography, visual effects, all world-class.

And yet couple that with Patrick Wilson's one-dimensional Dan Dreiberg, who should be hanging out with Dwight Schrute and Michael Scott. Malin Akerman, gorgeous, but with a performance not quite approaching the level of Cameron Diaz in THE MASK. Matthew Goode, clearly just sleepwalking until he gets to audition to play James Bond, is unforgivable. Fucking with so many little things for no reason. NIXON. Nixon fucking looking like Marv's dad and not being remotely like Nixon, but some half-assed cartoon. Jesus christ.

The grimace-inducing music cues. With the exception of only one, the All Along the Watchtower one, because by then I realized the movie was completely retarded and just smiled.

It it were simply awful, that would be easier to take. But this is something much more heart-wrenching.

Need time to think.